Today as a Valentine’s gift to all of you, we have a Guest Blogger. Jim Flaherty was a MadMan on NYC’s Madison Avenue (but he says, much better behaved than the TV series leading man). He’s a father, grandfather, and great grandfather. Jim wrote a book years ago dedicated to Older Friends he loved at the time, and rewrote it this year, because now he’s one of them. Jim’s home in NY State is an art-filled converted barn in the foothills of the Berkshires. Enjoy!
Of course, I’m not old. I’m, well, um, Elderly. Okay, I’m 86. But as God knows, even though I acknowledge the need to watch my step and do all the daily good-health things I do, I honestly think I’m still 60. Some mornings my mirror laughs at me, but I don’t look nearly as old as my biological age. Why? I remember my mother saying you have a choice every morning when you face your biggest enemy—that aging person in your bathroom mirror—you can scowl and growl, Good God, another day! Or . . . you can smile at that could-be-friend in the mirror and say, sweetly and lovingly, Good God, Another Day. I do that. Every day.
Every morning is a miracle. Another opportunity to be a better person—within yourself—and to others. That same Mother, (one chapter in my book is titled Mom & Me) raised me with the Golden Rule. Do unto others as you would have others do unto you. A lovely thought, but as a writer, I thought it was awkward. Lay it on a five-year-old and they’ll say, Huh? So I rewrote it for myself and my darling daughters—now 60 and 62. Just five words: You get what you give. Easy? If you give a helping hand, a sympathetic ear, a generous heart, a warming hug—you get it back. But if all you do is complain and get angry, and spread depression, and criticize—that comes back and bites you in—well, in your hindquarters.
I’m sure you get the idea–don’t stop being yourself. You can still create, learn, teach, and share. I talk a lot about Passions in the book—not the sweaty kind—but the reasons for facing every day with enthusiasm. It’s an old saying, but very true: You’re only as old as you feel. So don’t feel old. Don’t give in to all the naysayers who say you’re too old to do that. You should rest more. Or be careful, Mom. To hell with all that. Take up painting or writing or learn a new language or learn to swim, play bridge seriously, start a book club, or help other people who have too much pain and problems to deal with.
I always had much older friends my entire life. And when I was 42 years old, I wrote a love letter to them–I just finished it this year—when I’m 86. The title is as friendly as the book itself: DEAR OLD FRIENDS – A LOVING REMINDER THE BAND WON’T STOP PLAYING TILL YOU STOP DANCING XO, Jim It reminds readers—like you—that Today is the Oldest you’ve ever been—and The Youngest you’ll ever be—so let’s make something good happen. The book is available on Amazon, or if you drop me a line at jim@skiberty.com I’ll be happy to send you a direct link. I think I can honestly promise it will give you some ideas that will make your children, grandchildren and friends happier to see you. And don’t forget my Golden Rule: You get what you give. Have a wonderful day, friends, and think about how wonderful tomorrow will be! XO, Jim