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When we went to Shchyrets, it was winter and very cold. Our daughter in law was pregnant with their second child, and their other son was barely two years old. We dragged them all out to the small village where my husband’s ancestors had lived so long ago, and we were warmly welcomed by people in the nearby village. My husband found the very street where his family had lived and the well they drew for their water!
Kyiv itself was very different from the village. A modern capital city with fancy restaurants, movie theaters, wealthy Ukrainians driving around in cars with black tinted windows, gorgeous women dressed in fur from head to toe skimming over the icy pavement in their high heeled boots with graceful ease. Getting to know ordinary people was a bit more difficult. While Ukrainians with whom our son worked were friendly and gracious, talking to people on the street or in a cafe was a lot more difficult, because we didn’t speak the language. Maybe it was the weather, but I never got a single smile from any Ukrainian I passed on the street. There were not that many tourists in Kyiv at the time, and grinning foreigners were probably just considered a bit weird! I made it my mission to make one of the “babuschkas”, as the older women were called, smile back, but I never succeeded. They glanced at me in surprise but always hurried on their way. I didn’t take it personally!
The hospital where our second grandson was born was the most spotless, modern building you could ever imagine. I joked that you could eat off the floors, because someone was constantly mopping and cleaning them. When our daughter in law went into labor, since it was their second child, she and our son went right to the hospital. My husband and I followed later in a rickety cab with our oldest grandson (no seat belts then!), sliding and slipping through the icy and snowy streets of Kviv. We brought our oldest grandson into the hospital room to meet his new brother, and this was his reaction.
No matter what happens in Ukraine, we know that the people there will fight with everything they have. We worry about our current friends there, whose neighborhoods are being shelled indiscriminately. You may want to support the people of Ukraine but wonder what is the safest and most reliable way to do that? I would suggest Matthew25: Ministries, which is providing humanitarian aid in Ukraine. This relief organization was recommended by my friend, Matthew Lehman, who has lived and worked in Ukraine and is running for Congress from Kentucky (against one of only three Republicans who voted AGAINST the Ukraine resolution of support). The donation site for the relief is https://m25m.org/donate/
As we watch and wait for the outcome in Ukraine, my takeaway message is that all of our democracies are at risk, either from war or apathy. This is the first war that has been televised so extensively and communicated so aggressively via social media. My hope is that we will learn how to defend democracies more effectively around the world, not with weapons of war but weapons of words and collective action. Our main weapon in the U.S. is the Vote, which we have taken for granted and is being attacked now in almost every state. The vote is a legitimate “weapon” that each one of us can and must use if we want to save our democracy.